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Archive for Relationships

Stop Selling Yourself Short! | Engaged at Any Age

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· February 16, 2021 

Something has been puzzling me. Why do I know so many women who won’t settle for less than the best in everything they do – caring for their family, their career, how they present themselves to the world – yet will continue to make excuses for the men they date who continually disappoint them?

I had a friend who, in her 20’s, had a boyfriend who would call her on the spur of the moment, and she would jump at the chance to spend time with him even though he hadn’t given her any notice. His birthday gift to her one year was a collection of stuffed animals from a smoky bar’s “claw machine,” and they smelled like it too. She explained away this kind of thoughtlessness by saying he was so busy, he was saving his money for a house, etc. etc. etc. Mind you, this was a woman who had a graduate degree, a good job, great looks – the whole package. She was (is!) thoughtful and kind and would never treat anyone the way this guy treated her. Yet she hung on for several years, thinking she would be the one to change his behavior. Spoiler alert – she didn’t.

Click here to take the soulmate assessment and find out what vibe you’re sending out!

No matter how many times her friends and family told her he was not good for her, it wasn’t until she finally realized she was worth more than that she finally cut him loose. 

It’s one thing to put up with that kind of behavior from a man when you’re young and naïve. Quite another to be in your 40’s or beyond, mature, successful and accomplished!

I want to challenge you this year to honor the woman you are today!  

Raise both your standards and your self-esteem by refusing to spend your precious time on men who clearly aren’t interested in a long-term, mutually beneficial and authentic relationship. Look closely at your dating pattern. Does any of this behavior sound familiar in your partners, past or present? If so…time to re-examine!

  • He always wants you to come to him – meeting at the restaurant near him or driving his way for the evening.
  • He has no interest in planning anything to delight or surprise you, let alone impress you, with a date (in fact, often says, “Whatever you feel like doing is fine”)
  • He sees you when it’s convenient – for HIM
  • He is hesitant to introduce you to his friends, let alone his family
  • Your last “gift” was clearly purchased thoughtlessly and at the last minute (or worse, your birthday/anniversary/big promotion was forgotten altogether!)

If you saw a friend dealing with this kind of garbage in her relationship, wouldn’t you be fed up for her? Wouldn’t you tell her to move on? Of course you would.

Be a friend to yourself and repeat that you deserve nothing less than the best. Then start working on finding it!

Click here to take the soulmate assessment and find out what vibe you’re sending out!

Categories : All About You, Confidence, Dating, Relationships
Tags : Affection, attract your ideal man, confidence, dating, fall madly in love, feminine energy

How to Stop from Getting Friend Zoned | Engaged at Any Age

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· January 19, 2021 

I’ll never forget the night a friend of mine came to me in tears! She had been at happy hour with a man she had a huge crush, listening to him talk about his day, fantasizing about what it might be like to be married to him when all of the sudden he said the thing that broke her heart. “Oh Amy,” he said tenderly and genuinely, “you are SUCH a good friend.”

OUCH! 

Here she was, wedding planning in her mind while the whole time he was thinking of her as a buddy. It’s so disheartening and honestly it can make a woman question herself, her worth, even her femininity! 

Here are three things you can do to avoid getting boxed into the friend zone!

  1. Avoid talking to much about frivolous things– This is the number one thing that causes a man to see you as a friend. Women make the mistake of thinking men love to hear all about you, your life, your thoughts, your plans, your outfits. You get the idea. If you’re constantly asking for his advice or giving HIM advice, he’ll start to see you as a sounding board, not a potential romantic partner.  
  2. Wear dresses – Dial up your outfits if you feel you’re getting friend zoned. When you put on a dress it immediately separates you from your guy’s other friends. Dresses scream “WOMAN” and men love them. You’ll feel more feminine and he’ll feel more masculine and he will see you as a lady and not a friend. This works like magic.  I know it’s sounds simple but try it and watch what happens!
  3. Avoid Over sharing – This is a huge problem when dating and it’s about boundaries. When you over share not only is it a turn off but you’ve taking away a very important aspect of attraction! Mystery and intrigue. They may listen but they could lose respect for you and tune you out. Save the oversharing for your girlfriends

I’ll never tell you to be fake, but who doesn’t appreciate a little extra effort. Turn up the charm, send those attraction signals and you’ll quickly shift from buddy to BABE!

Go here to join my Free Ladies Club Facebook group and you’ll always have someone to talk to, someone who shares your goals and dreams and wants you to succeed!

Categories : All About You, Attraction, Confidence, Dating, Relationships
Tags : Affection, attract your ideal man, confidence, dating, fall madly in love, feminine energy

4 Quick Tips to Beat the Holiday Blues | Engaged at Any Age

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· December 24, 2020 

In today’s video, I talk about how hard the holidays can be when you are single and give you some tips to sidestep all the mental drama associated with being single over the holidays.

Click below to watch the video:

 

Go here to join my Free Ladies Club Facebook group and you’ll always have someone to talk to, someone who shares your goals and dreams and wants you to succeed!
Categories : All About You, Dating, Relationships
Tags : Affection, attract your ideal man, confidence, dating, fall madly in love, feminine energy

Asking Without Demanding | Engaged at Any Age

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· December 17, 2020 

In today’s video, I suggest monitoring your tone of voice, choose your words carefully, use “I” language.  Another important factor is timing! Timing is everything when you ask for what you want.  

Click here to watch the video:

 

Go here to join my Free Ladies Club Facebook group and you’ll always have someone to talk to, someone who shares your goals and dreams and wants you to succeed! 

Categories : Dating, Relationships
Tags : Affection, attract your ideal man, confidence, dating, fall madly in love, feminine energy

If You’re Post Divorce – Don’t Settle! | Engaged at Any Age

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· December 15, 2020 

I work with a lot of women who are looking at a new beginning, many because they are divorced. 

Starting over after a divorce can be hard emotionally, plus getting back into dating isn’t always a task we want to tackle. Your heart might still be pretty raw! 

On top of that, we may have underlying thoughts that make it difficult to put ourselves out there due to the breakup. We can be left wondering if we will ever find someone who is ready for a real relationship. Someone who will treat us the way we want to be treated. Or maybe we are worried about making another mistake!  

All that combined can be enough to make you want to join a convent—I’ve heard A LOT of women joke about that—or swear off men—yep, I’ve heard that one too!—but let’s look at it a different way.  

You already know what doesn’t work, and you have a better idea of what you’re looking for now that you’ve been through the battle! And we both know that money is a BIG issue after a divorce. Finding a man who is financially secure is important because, let’s face it, as a successful woman who has it all together, we want someone who is right there with us. 

One of the biggest issues in relationships can be finances. So if you feel a little nervous about looking for someone who has all their stuff together financially, don’t be! You’re not greedy. You’re not a princess. You just want someone who is your equal. And that’s awesome! 

Someone who doesn’t have direction or is always struggling to pay off credit cards or hasn’t bothered to save any money for the future isn’t someone you want as a partner, so don’t believe for a second that it’s ok to accept that. You know what you deserve, and that’s someone who has their finances together, just like you do! The total package is out there <name> so you don’t have to choose between desires!  

Don’t accept a date from a guy who isn’t on par with you just because a friend told you it’s time to get back in the game or because he has the most beautiful blue eyes or whatever! Know what you want, and don’t accept anything less! 

You’re amazing, and he should be too! 

Categories : All About You, Beliefs, Create the Life You Want, Dating, Relationships
Tags : Affection, attract your ideal man, confidence, dating, fall madly in love, feminine energy

How to Avoid The Hookups | Engaged at Any Age

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· December 10, 2020 

Do you ever feel like you need to put “Serious relationship inquiries only” on your online dating profile? Does it seem like most of the guys out there are just looking for a hookup? 

If that resonated with you, I’m sure you are feeling the frustration. You meet someone with potential, and he’s perfect on paper, but when you want to meet him, he asks you to come over for “a movie and cuddles.” Seriously?

I don’t care if he is a math professor and a model—that is NOT what you’re looking for. And you deserve so much more. 

Finding a guy who wants something more than a casual hook up when you meet them in the real world may seem like a challenge, but those guys really are out there. It is easier to talk about intentions online than in real life, so when you talk to them, let them know what you’re looking for. Be honest. 

Usually, they will be honest, too, if they are only looking to hook up (after all, they aren’t going to meet their goal with you!). Then you don’t have to worry about wasting your time on a “date” that is heading in the wrong direction. 

But a word of caution, name, don’t settle! If you suspect that he’s only looking to hook up, trust your gut, and don’t waste your time. And if you go out with a guy who only wants to hook up, don’t do it thinking that you can change his mind. Remember, men are pretty stubborn. If he wants a hookup, that’s probably all he wants! 

You know what you want. Don’t compromise!

Click below to watch the video:

Go here to join my Free Ladies Club Facebook group and you’ll always have someone to talk to, someone who shares your goals and dreams and wants you to succeed!
Categories : Dating, Relationships
Tags : Affection, attract your ideal man, confidence, dating, fall madly in love, feminine energy

3 Lies that Sabotage Dating & Relationships | Engaged at Any Age

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· December 8, 2020 

Relationships are built on mutual trust, so it doesn’t make sense to start out with a lie, right? But it happens all the time. People post an old picture of themselves twenty pounds lighter on a dating site. Or they are “exclusively” dating two or more people! 

I know that you don’t want to try getting into a relationship on the wrong foot because nothing good will come of that. So here are the three most common lies that can sabotage dating and relationships.   

  1. You say you are available, but you are not legally.

Lying about availability for a relationship is devastating for partners who discover their significant other has been dishonest. Sometimes people lie and say they are single when they are not, or they may lie about whether they have children. This is never fair to the person being lied to, or to the people being lied about. 

If you’re in the middle of a divorce, be honest about it. And if you’re married, then you especially should be honest about it. You would want the same level of honesty from someone you are dating, too. Nothing good can come from lying about your availability. 

Come join my Facebook Group Ladies Club for (free) feedback on your burning dating questions and tips for attracting and keeping the man of your dreams. 

  1. Pretending you’re ok when you’re not.

You should never lie about anything that bothers you in the relationship. You can be honest in an open but sensitive, tactful manner. Avoiding real communication, even if conflict arises, will take away from forming and maintaining an authentic relationship. You can’t expect any relationship to be completely free of disagreement. And you have to stand up for your needs and desires, too.  

Lying about your feelings can range from where you want to eat dinner, to where you want to live. In many relationships, lying about sexual satisfaction is also common. Pretending to enjoy a less than satisfactory sex life is bound to sabotage your relationship eventually. Lying often becomes a slippery slope that becomes easier to do than telling the truth 

  1. You cheated or he’s cheating.

If you’re cheating on your partner, then they may think something is wrong, and grasp at clues, to try to figure out what it is. Worse, when you aren’t honest about what’s going on, the lack of communication between the two of you may push them to spy, go through your wallet or phone, or search for information any way that they can find it. Lying, especially long-term, about any behavior or action is very wrong, and unfair to your partner. Consider what it can do to them? They probably abhor who they have become in the relationship, as a result.  

Even worse, is trying to make them think that the situation is all in their head, and that you are innocent of any wrong doing. Your partner wants to believe you. They love you. They want to think you would never lie to them. Cut it out. It’s cruel to live a lie—any lie. Both of you deserve better. 

Do build your relationship from a strong foundation that includes honesty. You wouldn’t be happy with someone you’re dating knowing that he lied to you. How will you know when the lies stop, right? 

And you want and deserve the same respect, so don’t let someone do this to you either. If you’re being lied to, then stand up for yourself. Lying is just not acceptable in a healthy relationship. 

Come join my Facebook Group Ladies Club for (free) feedback on your burning dating questions and tips for attracting and keeping the man of your dreams. 

Categories : Dating, Relationships
Tags : Affection, attract your ideal man, confidence, dating, fall madly in love, feminine energy

How to Find Love After 40 | Engaged at Any Age

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· December 3, 2020 

In today’s video I shared several steps you need to take to become the best version of yourself, the version that will be most appealing to men.  

Heal. Become more intimate with yourself.  

Take care of your body, mind, spirit. Look at who you surround yourself with. Forgive. These are just a few. I answered questions too! 

Click below to watch the video:

PS: Go here to join my Free Ladies Club Facebook group and you’ll always have someone to talk to, someone who shares your goals and dreams and wants you to succeed! 
Categories : Dating, Relationships
Tags : Affection, attract your ideal man, confidence, dating, fall madly in love, feminine energy
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