Watch the episode here:
Dating After 60: Three Tips To Give You Confidence
I’m going to talk about dating after 60 and the three tips to give you confidence. As an older woman, you have the power to make the connection that turns into dating opportunity on and offline. Dating after 60 can be fun, but it does require a fundamental shift in thinking. You have to be willing to make the first move. I know that’s awkward for a lot of you women, but hear me out. Betty Davis once said that getting old is not for sissies. Many women would argue that the same comment applies for dating after 60. Not only are there statistically fewer men, but the dynamic of human engagement and style of personal connection has changed dramatically since we were dating in our twenties. Then throw in a lifetime of love and loss that has made you distrustful and unwilling to get back into the dating game. Dating after 60 can be fun and a change in mindset is essential if you want to find romance over 60. This applies for women of all ages so I want you to listen up ladies. You may not realize it but men are often the ones who lack confidence and suffer fear of rejection. Take that into consideration along with these tips for dating after 60. The three tips to give you confidence.
As an older woman, you have the power to make a connection that turns into a dating opportunity on and offline. Tip number one is smiling genuinely. That’s it. I know it sounds so obvious. You’re just looking to make a friendly connection here. You’re not looking for anything more. When you smile friendly at a man, especially a man over 60, you’re sending him a signal that you’re approachable and that you’re easy going. It doesn’t imply that you’re looking for anything. It doesn’t imply you’re hitting on him. You’re just being friendly and it’s so important to establish this friendliness because that sends a signal to a man, especially men over 60 that are experiencing the same challenges. In their lack of confidence, you send them a signal that you’re approachable and you’re friendly and it’s safe to approach you and talk to you.One of the biggest regrets that we have in life is that we didn't have enough love in our life. Click To Tweet
Ladies, open up. Look around, make sure your head’s up and you’re looking around. If you see a man, make eye contact and give them a friendly, genuine smile. This works standing in line at Starbucks. It works when you go in the elevator. It works when you’re at a doctor’s office. It works when you’re at the valet. Practice it everywhere you go and soon it will be automatic because it opens doors. It opens doors that are closed if you don’t look up and make eye contact and give them that genuine smile. I want you to start practicing that genuine smile wherever you go. If you’re too nervous to start off with men, start off with women. They’re always going to give you a beautiful, warm, receptive smile in return. Then start to do it with men as well and you’re going to see magic happen.
Approach Men First
Tip number two, approaching men first. Strike up a conversation and start asking them things. It can happen effortlessly if you practice it. You’re going to strike up a conversation by saying something in the Starbucks line like, “I’m just going to get plain old coffee, but I know the drinks here are fantastic. What are you getting? What do you recommend? What’s your favorite drink?” If you hear somebody order something, a man, you can say, “What’s that like? I’ve always considered trying it. What do you like about it?” Maybe you’re at the grocery store and you see a man and he has groceries in his cart and you see an item that he has and you can say, “I’ve seen that before and I’ve always wanted to try it. What is it like?” Ask a question because a question begs for an answer. When you approach men first and you start up a conversation, you also opened the door for him to respond to you and then who knows where that’s going to lead?
I want to tell you a fantastic story about a client of mine that did this and now, her whole life has changed. The trajectory of her whole life has changed because of this one skill that she’s been practicing working with me. She went overseas for a month on a beautiful trip and on her way home at the airport, she was standing in the baggage line to check her baggage. There was a man standing behind her and because she’s been practicing these skills, starting with tip number one, which is engaging with a warm smile and tip number two, approaching men first by striking up a conversation, she turned around to the man behind her and just simply said, “How’s your day going?” That’s it. That’s all she said and long story short, they ended up talking and he asked her for coffee. They each had a two hour layover, so they moved over to another area in the airport. They had a cup of coffee. They ended up hitting it off and the next thing you know fast forward to now, they are making plans for a future together. She found her life partner standing in the baggage line at the airport. Love happens fast! I’m so thrilled for her.
She’s 63 years old and he’s the same age. They live in different countries. She doesn’t have a lot of ties here. She’s going to be moving over to join him. Everything just unfolded effortlessly and seamlessly because she is practicing my tools that work. She was ready. She wants romance in her life. She believes in love. She is showing up emotionally and more courageous than ever before and what did it bring her? Everything she’s ever wanted. This man is incredible man. He’s looking for her and he told her, “I’d been looking for you for so long.” Ladies, don’t underestimate the power in this. Men are looking for you. They’re looking for their soul mates too and all you have to do is turn around in a line and strike up a conversation. The next thing you know, you can be on your way to living the life of your dreams. I promise you this works, but you have to work it.
Learn The Art Of Flirting
If you like what I’m sharing, make sure you share, comment and like my page and subscribe to my Engaged at Any Age YouTube channel so that you’ll never miss another episode. Also, share it with your single friends who need these valuable tips so they can get in on the action. The last and final tip I have for you is a great one. Ladies, you have to learn the art of flirting. I know what happens as we get older. We get a little more withdrawn. We get a little more in our own head because of all the experiences we’ve had. Some of them haven’t been very pleasant and so we usually are thinking so much. We’re in our head and we’re not really present to what’s going on around us. We’ve lost our confidence, our mojo when it comes to flirting, but men love being flirted with. It’s really fun once you get the hang of it. What is the art of flirting? It is having the emotional courage to compliment men. You can start with compliment men. Compliment him on his shoes. I saw a man that had these cool shoes on. I was at Nordstrom buying a pair of shoes and he was waiting on me, the shoe salesman. He had these incredible pair of shoes on. I wasn’t flirting with him, but this is a great example that you can use.
I said, “I love your shoes.” They were these classic old-style loafers that I haven’t seen in a long time. I just simply said, “I like your shoes. Those are great.” He responded positively to that and he started telling me about the story of the shoes. There was this whole backstory around his shoes. We began a dialogue and it made the interaction much more enjoyable for both of us. We became friends in that moment. He’s helping me find shoes. He’s telling me stories. Now, we have a little connection going and that’s what you’re looking for. You’re not looking to meet your soulmate in one moment, but you might. You’re just looking to make that connection. Complimenting a man on something he’s wearing, his clothes, his hair or something he says or does. You’re like, “I admire that. That’s great. Where did you learn how to do that?”
Another thing you can do is ask for help simply by saying, “Excuse me, will you help me? Can you hand that to me? Can you pick this up? Would you do this for me?” Men love to help women. Asking for help is a really great one. Asking for directions or asking for a restaurant or a recommendation for a restaurant. Opening up and asking for help and complimenting men everywhere you go. Notice something about a man and bring it to his attention. That will strike up a conversation and open a dialogue. From there, who knows where it’s going to go. It might go nowhere and it doesn’t really matter. Your intention is just to become more open and present to what’s happening so that you can make dating fun over 60. Like one of my clients did, it could lead to meeting your soulmate and you never know unless you try.
These tips are so easy. I want you to go out and commit to yourself that you’re going to start applying these three tips. I’m going to give you just a couple of bonus suggestions on where to meet men. I go to the gym a lot and down at the gym before 9:00, between 6:00 and 9:00, it is crawling with men over 60. Men over 60 love to work out first thing in the morning. I’ve noticed that because I go to the gym at different times during the day and there is a large amount of men that are working out over the age of 60. Some of them are retired, some of them are still working and they’re getting in there to get their workout before they go to the office. They are everywhere and they’re friendly and they are open and they are talking and a lot of is very social for them.
Join your local gym and show up early and start meeting these men that are there during that time. Also, coffee shops especially on the weekends, where there’s outdoor seating and summer’s coming. This is a great opportunity for you to start making a regular daily visit to a coffee shop to find out when the men of your age group, the men in the age group that you want to date are there. Showing up consistently every day and making friends. We go to the little Brick & Bell coffee shop here in La Jolla and we know everybody that’s there during the time that we’re there. It’s interesting. There’s always a different group of people throughout the day, but we like to go right after we work out and we always see the same people. Now, we’re friends with those people and it’s really fantastic. You can create your own little community of people by getting out there and coffee shops are a great place to do that.
The most important guideline that I want to leave you with to build your confidence in dating over 60 is to simply do the things you love. Doing the things you love puts you out and about in places that you’re likely to cross paths with men where you can apply these three tips. Going to museums, going to book readings, going to meetups or going to restaurants that you want to go to. Don’t wait for somebody to go along with you. Go by yourself. Put yourself out there more and more and more. Go to early movie screenings. They have those at 5:00 or 4:30. Go there early. Make sure you get there early so you can talk to the ladies that run those screenings and those are a great resource for you or ways for you to meet men. Those ladies that are in your age group that are running those volunteer roles or handling those movie premiers or early showings, they know who the single men are in their community. They are more than happy to provide you with that information.
Women always love to help other women especially me. That’s why I’m here making this video for you. You strike up a conversation with those women. Ask them if they know any single, available men. You are single and you love to meet them. If you’re a widow and you’ve lost your husband, you can say, “I lost my husband a couple of years ago and so I’m looking to meet somebody new.” That’s perfectly fine. In fact, you’re going to create some compassion there and they’re going to take you under their wing and help you out. Anything that you say, just being honest and letting people know that you are single and you are looking to meet someone special. Put the word out. What do you have to lose? You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Make sure you’re vocal about your desire to have romance in your life, to have a committed relationship and even marriage to put yourself out there.
One of the biggest regrets that we have in life is that we didn’t have enough love in our life. We didn’t put ourselves out there. We didn’t take enough risks and why? Because of fear, because of what people think of us. It’s way past time to get over that. Get over what people think of you. What people think of you is none of your business. I want you to start taking that attitude. I hope this was helpful. I’m going to tell you about my freebie. I want you to go to SoulmateIQ.com and take my Soulmate Assessment. It’s a short quiz that will give you the vibration that you’re sending out, the frequency that you’re sending out, and how close you are to attracting love. You’re always sending out a vibration. I want to help you to recognize what the vibration is you’re sending out and if you’re sending out the right vibration or the right frequency. Whatever you’re sending out, you’re getting back by the Law of Attraction because likes attract likes. I’m going to also send you a feminine exercise along with your frequency to help you get you further into alignment, which is going to help you speed things up and fast track your ability to manifest your soulmate.What people think of you is none of your business. Click To Tweet
I am so passionate about helping women to learn to deliberately date and consciously create the man of their dreams and I’m very successful at doing that. The woman that I was speaking about is now 63, her whole life is starting anew. She’s in a whole new book. Her life has just taken off in ways that she’s been dreaming of for years and it happened very fast. I have other ladies in their 60s that are getting married and they’re having all this romance, but they had to take a risk. They had to learn the tools and the skill set and get the support and learn the formula and the strategy for success.
That’s what I teach in my program and especially geared for women over 40s, 50s, and 60s. Ladies, step out of your comfort zone and claim your dreams. Do not go quietly into that good night or whatever that saying is. I know that you want love in your life and I know that I can get you there much faster than you can on your own. Check out the program and get ahold of me before it’s too late, before another year passes you by and you wished you would have taken action. This is what it’s all about. It’s taking action so that you can start living the life that you came here to live. I hope this was helpful and I want you to know, I’m sending you so much love.