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Archive for Commitment

Don’t be Afraid to Say Goodbye

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· March 2, 2020 
· No Comments

Sometimes in the course of a relationship there comes what I call the point of no return. Maybe it’s yet another canceled date. Maybe he listened with half an ear yet again after he asked you about your day. Maybe he didn’t ask about your day at ALL! Whatever “it” is, your gut knows it and will tell you in no uncertain terms that it’s time to move on.

When I work with a client, I encourage her to be attuned to how a man “shows up” for her. Does he, for example, make plans and keep them (as opposed to saying he doesn’t care what restaurant she picks)? Remember how she hates mushrooms? Listen to her and ask follow-up questions when they talk? The definition of showing up is different for every woman, but if your man doesn’t do it early and often, it’s almost always better to break things off sooner rather than later!

“Easy for you to say, Jaki!” I know, I know. Hear me out.


Are you ready to find your Soulmate? Take the Soulmate Assessment and find out what frequency you are sending out and how close you are to attracting your Soulmate! www.SoulmateIQ.com
 

Of course, it’s hard to let go of the “known,” but remember that your pangs of regret and hesitancy are coming from a place of fear, not love. And we always, always want to operate from a place of love and acceptance. It’s best to pause and breathe and reframe an ended relationship, not as a waste of time but rather a lesson in which you gained clarity about what you don’t want. When you think of things that way, you reinforce your self-love and will resolve to go after what you really deserve next time! Let go of who isn’t for you, and you’ll have space and freedom to make room for someone better. It is that simple.

Are you still not sure it’s better to get out sooner? Here’s some perspective from one of my clients!
“I decided to end the relationship about a week ago. I found N. to be too intense and needy. He wanted my undivided attention and for us to be together ALL the time. He was controlling and jealous of my other relationships with friends and family. I became less attracted to him the more I got to know him. I discussed the issues and my concerns with him. Rather than working together on a solution, he told me he “needed more” from me! At that point, I knew there was no point in continuing the relationship. Yet, I am so thankful for having dated him, as I learned a lot about myself and what I do and don’t want in a relationship.”


Are you ready to find your Soulmate? Take the Soulmate Assessment and find out what frequency you are sending out and how close you are to attracting your Soulmate! www.SoulmateIQ.com
 

This is a perfect example of what I’m talking about. Instead of wallowing in fear and feeling uncertain if she did the right thing, my client now has clarity and feels HOPEFUL about what’s possible. She’s not clinging to N. as if he’s the only man on Earth – she knows he isn’t!

Besides, in this era of internet dating, your new possibilities are right there in a simple click or swipe – you just need to be open to them!

If you feel stuck and unhappy with who you’re dating, time to take stock, ask yourself if this is how you’ve dreamed a relationship would be…and if not, time to move on!

xo
Jaki

Are you ready to find your Soulmate? Take the Soulmate Assessment and find out what frequency you are sending out and how close you are to attracting your Soulmate! www.SoulmateIQ.com
 

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Categories : All About You, Create the Life You Want, Dating, Relationships
Tags : Boundaries, Commitment, communication, dating, high-value woman, relationship, Self-worth, Space

That Secret to Get a Man to Commit

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· June 17, 2019 
· No Comments

 

I want to offer you a two-part “love hack”!

Sometimes, we get so stuck in our heads when we’re worried about making the right impression in a new relationship. It can make us feel stiff and uncertain. And that can make us come across as cold.

Since that’s exactly what you DON’T want, I’d like you to go into your next date remembering that you are a high-value woman. You are confident. You are passionate about things you enjoy. And you are worthy of being with someone who appreciates all that!

You truly have to believe in your value so it shines through. THIS is what a man needs to see to commit. You need to show him that you have something to offer that other women don’t. Talk about what is really important to you and let him into your world. You want to be with someone who respects your interests, so don’t worry about being judged.

The second part of this is being vulnerable. Vulnerability is NOT weakness. It’s about having the strength and courage to be open and honest, with no guarantee of a result. That is FAR from weak!

Vulnerability helps you connect on a deep level. Open up and show him your true self. Men innately want to help and, honestly, take care of a woman, even if it’s just a few little things—we’re not talking about a 1950s housewife, by the way. Let him see that you’re a real person, not just your Facebook profile (come on, we all know those are everyone’s highlight reels).

When you show him that you have frustration or uncertainty—just like everyone else—it opens up that beautiful space of love so you can have deep conversations. Be real. Let him be there for you.

Sometimes a man will offer to help you with something because it makes them feel like they are taking care of you, so be open to receiving. If he offers to do something for you, take him up on it. Be appreciative! If he’s trying to do something that will make your life easier, even if it’s picking up Mexican to go for dinner, that’s a step in the right direction!

Love,

Jaki

PS: Take the Swipe Right Quiz! Find out what’s Blocking Your Dream Man from Finding You Online?

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Categories : Attraction, Confidence, Create the Life You Want, Episodes, Feminine Essence, Relationships
Tags : Affection, Commitment, dating, Emotionally Connect, Men, relationship

3 Secrets To Emotionally Connect With Men

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· June 11, 2019 
· No Comments

EAA 9 | Emotionally Connect With Men

 

Relationships always begin with a connection; but to get committed, you have to emotionally connect with your partner. How do you achieve that? Jaki shares the secrets to emotionally connect with a man, especially as you age. Learn some tips on how you can continue to turn yourself and your relationship up.

—

Watch the episode here:

3 Secrets To Emotionally Connect With Men

I’m excited about connecting with you. We are talking about these secrets that you need to know so that you can emotionally connect with a man. When you make an emotional connection with a man, that’s how you get a commitment. It’s not until you emotionally connect that you can get a commitment from a man because they don’t make commitments over a sexual connection. You want to push for and look for and explore creating that emotional connection with a man. That’s exciting to do.

Keep It Sexy

The best way to connect to a man on an emotional level is to keep it sexy. Keeping it sexy means keeping light. Keeping it playful and keeping it fun. It’s important to not go to the end of the story and not to attach to an outcome. As soon as we start to attach to an outcome of how we want it to turn out, then we lose our place in the present. The present is where all our power is. You can’t be playful and fun and happy when you’re thinking about the past or worrying about the future. You have to make the moment sexy and fun for him. We all know men love sex. Women do too but men want it sexy. They want to feel alive, especially middle-aged men. They want to feel that they still have it going on.

A lot of the reason why men go through a midlife crisis is that they feel like they are not desirable to women anymore. They don’t feel that they got it or the women don’t look at them in the same way. That explains a lot of why I’m encouraging not necessarily to sexually objectify yourself, that’s not what I’m saying at all. It’s just that as we age, we tend to stop turning it up too because maybe our estrogen levels are dipping and we just don’t feel like it. If we want a man, you have to learn to emotionally connect with him and we all want to feel alive and men especially want too.

Here are some ways you can do that. Clean out your closet. Get rid of the old lady clothes. First of all, we can dress differently now as we age. You don’t have to start dressing a certain way as your grandmother did. You can personally dress like me. I’m 54, so I’m going to have a whole training about aging. I’m excited about dating in your 50s and beyond and if you should lie about your age and all of that. I’m excited to cover that topic. It’s not feeling like you have to stop dressing the way that you did when you were 40 and even 30. Our hemlines come down and maybe we’re wearing a long-sleeved shirt if you’re more comfortable with that, but I definitely think you need a great bra. You need to get those girls up and together and get them on the same page because they’re beautiful and you’re beautiful. Use your assets. Make sure that you’re dressing according to your look but that it’s hip, it’s fun and essential and it will turn the men on. When I had my online dating profile, I had a pink blouse, a pop of color because men love that. I had a pair of jeans on one of the pictures and I had a long-fitted dress on. I dressed more hip like I did when I was at 40. I haven’t changed that.

As soon as we start to attach an outcome of how we want our relationships to turn out, we lose our place in the present. Click To Tweet

In fact, I went through my closet and I noticed I started getting a little frumpy. I was like, “What’s happening to me?” That’s why I did the highlights on my hair. I was getting dark. I was like, “I’m going to go into this dark look, but it made me look older.” My daughter told me that. She said I looked like Elvira. I love Elvira but I don’t necessarily want to look like her. I want to look like me, only brighter. I did the highlights and it brightened up my look. I’m not saying you have to even go get a highlight but maybe consider it. Maybe you want to brighten up your look with a new look. You can get some new makeup or skin tone change. The time of year change. What you wore in the winter in terms of makeup and hair needs to change for the summer. Keeping it sexy is helpful.

As we get older, we want to have fun. We want to have a fun relationship. We want to smile and laugh more and men are looking for that especially if they’ve been married before. You all heard me say that but just a little reminder. Sometimes you need to be reminded of the simplest steps over and over again until we got it. That’s the secret number one to creating an emotional connection. It’s being fun and playful and throwing in a little sexiness. This shirt isn’t revealing anything, but it’s sexy in its own way. You can look at your wardrobe, clean out your closet and get up to speed with getting rid of everything that is frumpy. Only keep the things that you feel good at and just re-wear those. If it’s not in your spending plan to get some new clothes, just go through your closet and streamline it so that when you go to reach for something, only the best stuff is there.

Physical Touch

The next thing is physical touch. Physical touch is important to men. They want to put their hands on you. At the beginning of dating, that’s not necessarily appropriate. However, when you are dating, you can reach up and touch your man’s forearm. You can put your hand on their shoulder and even picking a piece of lint off his shirt is intimate. That is a very intimate gesture. Only women and men that are having a connection would do that. If you are sitting there with a man and he has a little piece of lint, you reach up and get that for him. That’s a very intimate act and it’s a physical connection. As you start dating, holding hands, putting your hand around his shoulder, his waist and seeking his hand out. If he’s not affectionate, then you can be affectionate. I love affectionate. My husband, what he does to me that I love is that he swats me on the butt quite a bit. I like that. It’s not a hard swat, but he gives me a little pat. It’s fun. Michael is very affectionate and so am I. We have a lot of fun playing and being very physical. Don’t be afraid to do that.

EAA 9 | Emotionally Connect With Men

Emotionally Connect With Men: Consistently appreciate every little thing so that you don’t ever take them for granted.

Be Interested In His Interests

Play with his hair. When you’re on a date, get your hand back there. Men loved to have their scalp rubbed too. If I had my fingers in my husband’s scalp, he goes crazy for that. If you’re dating a man, give him a nice scalp massage. He will love that. Physical touch is important to create that emotional connection. Another secret is to be interested in his interests. Even if you’re not interested in those things, you can certainly be interested in them because he is. That’s what the interest level comes from. You’re like, “I never thought ice hockey was that big of a deal but my husband loves it. Now, I love ice hockey.” It’s fun to watch. It’s a little bit of a brutal sport. Sometimes I have to cover my face but that’s just me. I’m not saying you need to do what I’m doing. I’m just giving you real-world examples because they’ll help you connect.

Show Respect, Admiration, And Appreciation

If your guy is up in his head and he’s an engineer or maybe he’s a nerd and he likes to do certain things that come along with that, then go for that. “I want to know all about it,” because maybe there’s something there that you will find interesting. The fact that you showed interest in what he’s interested in, he starts to see you as an equation in his life. He starts to put you together in a future scenario with him. You might become interested in those topics because he is. That will be another way to create that emotional connection. That was already three things but I’m going to keep going because I have more here on my list. This is the big one. Show respect, admiration and appreciation. It sounds like this is all about the guys. I’m like, “Jaki, all you’re saying is all about the men.” You want to be in a committed relationship that leads to a commitment or marriage like what I wanted.

I’m willing to do and I was willing to do what it takes to have what I want and frankly, we all love compliments. We all love to be appreciated and noticed and witnessed. Start practicing that now on your date so that when you meet a man, it’s automatic. You are automatically doing that. I do it about every little thing that Michael does. I can’t overemphasize this enough. I’m like, “Thank you for the coffee. Thanks for taking out the trash. Thank you for picking up more limes. Thanks for picking up dinner. Thank you. It was so thoughtful of you. It’s so sweet of you. I appreciate that you did that. That means so much.” I lay it on because first of all, it’s coming from a sincere place. I am grateful and I do appreciate him, but it’s a habit that I trained myself to remember to consistently appreciate every little thing so that I don’t ever take it for granted. Just because I’m saying this in the beginning, it doesn’t mean a year later he doesn’t want to hear it. I want to stay married. The things that I’m teaching you is about getting into a relationship but there’s a high divorce rate. I want to get you in the relationship but I also want to keep you in the relationship. I don’t ever want you to be divorced. It’s a painful experience to go through.

Sometimes you need to be reminded of the simplest steps over and over again until you get it. Click To Tweet

Practicing appreciation and gratitude is going to keep you in that relationship. I consistently do it because it’s a habit. I want my husband to know how much I appreciate and love and respect him so I’m consistently using that tool to make sure he knows my level of commitment for him. In return, he gives so much to me. He thinks about what he can do for me, how he can make my life easier and how he includes me in the decision making. He always runs everything by me. It comes back to you tenfold. Gratitude is a powerful force. The more you think about, the more you bring about, the more appreciation and gratitude you’re showing for anything, you’re going to get that back. The more you do it, the more you get it back. It was invoking the Law of Least Effort. The more you do have what you want to be done, the easier it is to receive it back tenfold.

Surprises

Another thing that is good and it worked well with my relationship is surprises. As women, we are the one who likes surprises. We want to be surprised and that’s great but men love it too. Surprising your date. If you’ve been dating for a couple of weeks, I would recommend doing a little surprise like, “I have a little surprise for you.” He’s going to be like, “What is it?” You’re like, “If I tell you it’s not going to be a surprise.” It could be something simple. Maybe you made him his favorite dish and you bring it to him or maybe you picked up a book that he talked about. Maybe after dinner, you go for a drive and you show him something that you think that he would enjoy. Something that you thought out or maybe you’re getting him tickets to a sporting event that he wants to go to or a ticket to a concert. That’s after you’ve been dating for a couple of weeks. I don’t recommend giving gifts, but the surprises are always appreciated. Everybody loves a surprise because it means you put a lot of thought into doing something special for him. That’s how you continue to create an emotional connection, which leads to a commitment.

Give Him Freedom

The last tip I want to share with you is an important one. It’s giving him this freedom. Make sure he knows that he has plenty of freedom. People get freaked out when they get into a committed relationship and they start to go, “I’m not going to have any freedom.” The opposite is true. I have so much more freedom being in a committed relationship and being married because I don’t have to worry about dating anymore because that’s a time-consuming endeavor. I don’t have to go online. I don’t have to spend my time organizing who I spoke to and to be on my phone all the time, so I actually have more freedom. Also, I have the security of the commitment that we made together. I’m not talking about financial. I’m talking about that security based on the highest form of integrity, of honesty and truth that we’re made to each other. That we’re going to be there for each other and I can relax into that. When I can relax into that, Michael has all the freedom he wants. It’s not up to me to give or take it away. He’s a free person.

EAA 9 | Emotionally Connect With Men

Emotionally Connect With Men: You can get into a relationship but not necessarily stay in it.

 

Getting married doesn’t limit you and make you do a certain thing, not if you set it up right in the beginning. I was clear from the beginning. I was saying things like, “Go with your friends. That would be great. You should go. You should do it.” I’ll give you an example. One day, it was father’s day and his children were not with him. That was when he was spending more time with his children when they were younger. He had that day without his children and I was thinking I’m going to do something nice for him. I’m going to make him brunch. I went to the store and I got a bunch of things for lox and bagels, but he had a different plan. I didn’t tell him that I was going to surprise him. He called me up and he said, “I’m going a 45-mile road biking ride with his best friend.” I’d already made all of this. I had set it all up and I was going to surprise him. I printed out a Father’s Day card with a picture of him and his kids on it from my printer, but I went with the flow because I’m in my feminine energy. I was like, “That sounds a great day.” Inside I was disappointed but I said, “You go and have a great time. That’s going to be awesome. Take a picture when you guys are out.”

The next thing I know is I hear somebody outside my door, he’s outside on his bike with his best friend. They were calling out to me. I came outside and took a picture of them together and I wished him a good ride. They rode off and they had a great day. What he wanted to do with his day is spend it with his friend. I didn’t take it personally. I went inside and I ate my lox and bagels with my kids. That’s what I mean about freedom. I didn’t even show any sign of that because he has a right to make plans and have his own life and his own interest and I want to support those. I guess that was plan B. Make sure you’re relaxed in things if he springs it on you, “My friends are all getting together tonight after work. I want to go.” You should say, “You should go. It’s going to be great. You go and have a good time. I’ll catch up with you later.” He’ll feel safe knowing that you are not going to freak out and try to clamp down on his time. He’s going to want to spend more time with you because you’re so easy going. That’s an important thing for men.

One of the biggest reasons why men resist commitment is because they sense on some level that you’re going to try to monopolize their time. What happens is if you make sure that they know and that you’re not going to interfere with the things they want to do and in fact, you’re going to encourage it and support it. All of a sudden they’re like, “I’d rather be with her. She’s so easy going and then if something does come up, I can always rearrange our schedule and I can go do something with my friends.” For example, my husband has his monthly meeting that he does with him and his business partners. They have a couple of drinks and they have appetizers. They talk about business and I’m like, “I’m going to make plans and go do my thing. Have fun and I’ll talk to you when you get home tomorrow or later.” I want him to feel that he can do whatever he wants as long as he comes home to me and he does. That’s the point. I’ve covered quite a bit and I’m just wondering if any of you have any questions.

Gratitude is a powerful force. The more you think about, the more you bring about. Click To Tweet

Thank you so much. I want to also share with you that I just opened the doors to my annual Engaged at Any Age Program. It’s a nine-month private/group coaching program. It’s the only way that you’re going to get to work with me. I do it once a year and I’ve already enrolled many women into it so I have a limited amount of seats. The program used to be a year but I changed it to nine months because I’m getting women to the finish line in nine months or less because I have this formula that works. What you need is a structure. You need a container to hold that space. You need the support. You need accountability and what’s important is you need the environment. The environment is where you can grow and foster change. If you’re not in the right environment and if you’re not surrounding yourself by the right people who have the right strategies that can teach you the skills that you need, that not only get you into a relationship but keep you happily married ever after, you can get into a relationship but you’re not going to stay in it.

It is an investment but either way, you’re going to pay. You’re going to pay if you stay single another month or you’re going to have to pay to invest in yourself so you can scale up in these areas and become as wise as I am. You’re complimenting me here, saying lovely things and I appreciate it but I want that for you. I want you to outgrow me. I want you to have these skills so you can apply them in your life so that you can see that ripple effect that affects your children, your friendships, and all of your relationships. Your life is going to expand in so many ways. It’s just not one thing that happens when you get engaged or get in a committed relationship. It affects your social circles. You get new friends, friends of your husbands or your partners. They become your best friends. You get new friends. Your social life takes off in a different way.

Now, you have someone to go to all these events that you’ve been wanting to go to or maybe you don’t want to go to events. You have someone to do things with, somebody to witness your life and somebody to have your back and you’ll have their back. You’re also going to have combined resources. Your resources now are more enhanced. When you’re in love and you have love in your life, so much abundance can come to you. If you invest in yourself, you get that back so quickly. I just look at where I was years ago and where I am now, the growth has been exponential. Every year, I double and double my business and my husband too. We’re both booming and people say, “There’s just something about you.” We have so much love. We’re still so in love. All these pillars that I’m explaining to you are enhanced in every area in my life. My home, my social and my family has been in large with his family. The traveling and the combined resources, it’s incredible. The best investment you’ll ever make is the investment you make in yourself. Make sure you do that because either way, you’re going to pay. I will see you all here in the group. Don’t forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel so you don’t miss an episode. Thank you for being here and I’m just sending you so much love.

Important Links:

  • Engaged at Any Age Program
  • YouTube Channel – Engaged at Any Age
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Categories : Episodes
Tags : Affection, Commitment, dating, Emotionally Connect, Men, relationship

I Used to Hate Myself

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· June 7, 2019 
· No Comments

You’re probably pretty surprised to hear me say that. But it’s true. I used to hate myself. I suffered so much abuse as a child that I grew up feeling shame, unworthiness, and a lot of self-loathing. Not only did I hate myself, but I also blamed myself for what happened to me. I tried for years to love myself, but for various reasons, I couldn’t figure out how!

That’s when I knew I had to figure out the “self-love” thing. Once I did, I had to share it with women all over the world so they too could experience how much different life can be when there is love in it.

Elizabeth found herself in a similar situation, and here’s what she’s has to say to you about her journey.

Also, I want to remind you that I’m hosting a LIVE COACHING CALL tomorrow morning (Saturday) at 8 AM Pacific – 11 AM Eastern, where I’m going to talk to you about Block, Beliefs, and Behaviors that Sabotage YOU in Love and tell you about the program and answer your questions and offer you coaching. No sign up required! 

Here are your access details:

Date & Time: Saturday, June 8th at 8:00 AM Pacific / 11:00 AM Eastern

To attend this event, click here 15 minutes before the event time:

https://InstantTeleseminar.com/Events/115904595

If you don’t have access to the web, you can listen in by dialing (425) 440-5010, and using the following conference pin: 619300#

If that number doesn’t work for some reason, here is a list of alternative numbers, including international numbers:

https://InstantTeleseminar.com/Local/?eventid=115904595

Be on this call if you want to be engaged or in a committed relationship this year!

It’s your turn now.

Your turn to put yourself and your heart’s wishes FIRST!

Take that first step into a new and happier future. Get your man, get the ring!

xo.

Jaki

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Categories : All About You, Attraction
Tags : Affection, Commitment, dating, Emotionally Connect, Men, relationship

Why Feminine Energy is Kryptonite for Men!

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· June 6, 2019 
· 2 Comments

Enjoy the replay of my Live video where I talk to you about: Connecting with Your Feminine Energy and learn why it’s kryptonite for men!

Ladies, you can’t argue with science. Research has shown over and over and over again — feminine attracts masculine. And if you want that hot shot alpha male in your life, you need to keep that in mind.

I will teach you how to overcome your fears and empower yourself so you can connect with men with grace and ease. This allows you to create a deep emotional connection that leads to a commitment!

xo.

Jaki

PS: Go here to book a call with me for more information about my Engaged at Any Age program before I close enrollment and see if this is a fit for you before it’s too late!!and see if this is a fit for you before it’s too late!!

2 Comments
Categories : All About You, Attraction
Tags : Affection, Commitment, dating, Emotionally Connect, Men, relationship
EAA 16 | Commit

6 Signs That A Man Will Commit

Posted by Jaki Sabourin 
· April 30, 2019 
· No Comments

EAA 16 | Commit

 

Sometimes, we tend to sabotage ourselves by not saying directly what we mean. Most especially in dating, we tread this fine line of finding out where your relationship is going. If you are in this dilemma, how then can you know if a man is ready to commit? Take note of the six signs that Jaki shares as she gives you scenarios on when you will find the right opportunity.
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Watch the episode here:

 

6 Signs That A Man Will Commit

Intentionality

Let’s talk about the six signs that a man will commit. The first one is intentionality. This is important because it starts from the beginning. Is he asking you out on a date or is he saying, “Do you want to hang out?” A man that asked you on a date is definitely interested in pursuing you. A man that says, “Do you want to hang out?”, you don’t know what that means. You might want to clarify and ask him, “Are you asking me out on a date?” If he says, “I want to hang out,” then you might want to say no. You want to be intentional as well because you want to find your soulmate. You want to settle down. You want to be in a long-term committed relationship. You need to be intentional. Do not go out with men that want to hang out. Don’t waste your time. They’re going to friend zone you.

Consistency And Reliability

The second of the six signs if a man’s going to commit to you is consistency and reliability. You have to watch his consistency and reliability. Is he following up with you after your dates? Is he texting you? Is he keeping in touch with you? Is he keeping his commitments? You want to see if he values your time by making sure that it includes him. He wants to know that you’re available to him if he’s interested in a commitment. He’s going to be asking you out, making future plans with you, and he’s going to be making you a priority. If he’s not doing that, he doesn’t see you as a priority and he sees you can maybe be bumped for something better that comes along. You want to look at those things closely. All these signs are going to help you stay focused and clear on your path, so you don’t get off track to attracting your soulmate.

A man that's interested in committing to you is going to be willing to take it slow. Click To Tweet

Good Communicator

Sign number three if he’s going to commit to you: is he direct and is he a good communicator? He takes you out on a great date and he didn’t call you for a couple of weeks. Maybe he texts you every day of the week and then he disappears on the weekend and you don’t hear from him for 48 hours. He doesn’t text you at all during the weekend, but then he blows up your phone over the weekend. He’s not being direct, and he doesn’t have good communication skills. Maybe he’s not quite serious yet. He loves the flirting fun that he’s having with you. If he’s thinking about you in a serious way, he is not going to be playing any games at all. He’s going to be direct and he’s going to communicate that to you in his actions.

Exclusivity

The fourth sign that a man’s going to commit to you is exclusivity. Exclusivity is when he’s made it clear that he wants to see you and only you. How he’s going to show you he’s moving in that direction is that he’s seeking out time with you and he’s planning ahead. He’s not planning ahead to do social things like movies and concerts, even though those are great. In the beginning, you want chunks of time together so that you can get to know each other. If you’re spending the day together and it rolls into an evening, that’s fantastic because that shows you he’s interested in getting to know you and he wants to spend more time with you. Look at the time and the quality of time. Not quantity necessarily, quality. Not spending it with groups and not spending it in social situations where you’re not able to talk and go deeper and discover the deeper things about each other and then have those deeper shares.

EAA 16 | Commit

Commit: If a man does not share his vision with you, he’s either afraid or did not include you.

 

Taking It Slow

Here’s your fifth sign that a man’s going to commit to you. He’s going to be taking it slow. I know this sounds counterproductive, but a man that’s interested in committing to you is going to be willing to take it slow because he also wants to get to know you before he jumps into bed with you. The relationship that started out fast and furious and hot usually burns out fast as well. You set the pace for that. I would definitely take it slow to create that physical connection because you’re looking to create the emotional connection first. That’s the key to getting a commitment with a man. You have to connect with a man emotionally. Physical men don’t connect and bond physically. It’s a physical act. You’re looking for that pace to be slow and steady so that it doesn’t burn out. Remember, it’s a marathon, not a sprint. It’s a marathon in the beginning when you’re getting to know somebody. If he’s not pushing you to have sex, that’s great because he’s looking at you for someone serious. Don’t worry about that. That’s totally a blessing.

Willing To Talk About Your Relationship

Here’s the final sign that a man is going to commit to you. He’s willing to talk to you about your relationship. I recommend and I’ve talked about this before that on the first or second date, you are bringing up the topic of what his life plans are. All you have to do is say, “Where do you see yourself in five years? What do you have planned for your life? What’s your vision for your life?” Smile and wait for him to share that with you. At this point, there’s nothing invested. You’re not invested emotionally. He’s not invested emotionally. He knows what his plan is and that’s a non-threatening way to say it. Men know what their goals in life are like you do. Your goal is to get married or get into a committed relationship. You’re clear on that and they are too. Make it clear of what you’re looking for right in the beginning, in the first couple of dates. As I said, there’s no emotional investment yet. It rolls off the tongue much easier. It doesn’t feel any pressure on him and it’s a normal question to ask. You don’t want to waste your precious time. I’m all about encouraging not to waste time because I want you to fast track. Men, when they’re ready, they come right in. They are ready as you are.

The relationship that started out fast, furious, and hot burns out fast as well. Click To Tweet

I want to leave you with this. Sometimes men are a little bit clueless when it comes to the commitment phase so be patient with them. Listen to them, trust your gut, and don’t be afraid to continue to communicate how you’re feeling in the relationship at every stage and see what response you get back. Checking in with them and saying things like, “What’s your vision for us? What’s your vision for our future together?” and smile. You expect him to tell you. If he does not share with you what his vision is for you, he’s either one, really afraid or two, he knows what his vision is and it doesn’t include you. It’s either that he’s in fear or he’s not including you in that vision and you need to know. If he doesn’t answer that question, I would let it sit for a day or two, then I would circle back to it and say, “I asked you a question the other day about what your vision was for us and you didn’t answer me. I found that was interesting. I want to ask you again and give you another opportunity to communicate with me. For the level of intimacy that we share, I feel I deserve an answer to that question. What is your vision for us?” Do you see how I set that tone? Do you see how I used that? It’s with a feather. It’s always gentle. It’s always curious. It’s not demanding.

You need the answers to these questions because you’re a high-value woman and your time is precious and valuable. When you ask those questions, he senses that. He needs to feel not too much pressure, but he needs to know that you will walk. You will vote with your feet and walk if he does not give you the answers that you’re asking for because you want a juicy, intimate, and deep relationship. That is a question that he is obligated to answer if you’re experiencing some depth and intimacy, especially physical intimacy after you’ve agreed that you’re on the same page in terms of what you’re looking for in life. Hold your standards up high lady, because then you’ll attract a man that will meet you there or he’ll rise up to meet you there. Let me tell you about my freebie, it’s my Soulmate Assessment. Go to SoulmateIQ.com and take my quiz. It’s going to give you an assessment of what frequency you’re vibrating at and how close you are to attracting your soulmate. I’m going to send you your assessment along with the feminine exercise so that you can shift further into alignment so that you can fast track your ability to attract your soulmate because I’m all about fast-tracking. Thank you for joining me. I hope this was helpful. Don’t forget to subscribe to my channel. I’m sending you lots and lots of love.

Important Links:

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Categories : Confidence, Create the Life You Want, Dating, Episodes, Relationships
Tags : commit, Commitment, communication, dating, relationships, the next step

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