We’ve all been there.
We’ve all felt the sting of heartbreak. The emptiness. The uncertainty.
If this is how you are feeling now, stuck, unable to heal, I wrote this for you!
First, let me reassure you that you are in my heart and that the feelings you are currently feeling are temporary.
Yes, you are in victim mode – it feels that so much has happened TO you.
You are stuck in the blame/shame/victim game. And it’s ok. It’s a REALLY easy trap to fall into. You have suffered, and because of that, have come to believe that there are no good men out there – or that if there ARE, they won’t like you, or want you. You are afraid to take risks. You feel “less than” or “not good enough,” “inadequate” and afraid of rejection.
It’s hard for you to try again after previous rejections and heartbreak. You don’t know how to hold boundaries with men, so they treat you poorly – which reinforces that belief that there are no good men out there. You always pick the wrong men and fear they won’t like you or will leave you. You pick men who are emotionally unavailable, needy or broken. You tend to attract men that don’t step up.
It’s exhausting, and eventually you start to believe that you are better off alone. But you know, deep down, that you are longing to share your life with someone. And you will!
Wow. You hit the nail on the head. Can I really fix this – and how?
This is a journey of personal growth and begins with focusing on yourself. Loving yourself as you are is vital. You’ve got to stop looking for someone else to fill the space in you. You are already complete. Repeat that – YOU ARE ALREADY COMPLETE. YOU ARE ENOUGH.
A man isn’t the answer, he is a compliment. A bonus. The icing on the cake. When you are in victim mode you send the message that the man is the answer and that’s a heavy burden that most men run from!
Remember, you come to this party already complete and whole and ready to have a real Soulmate connection. Your MAIN goal is self-work, self-love and self-acceptance. You will need to heal the hurt from the past and release the hold it has on you. This will help you to learn to hold healthy emotional and physical boundaries and start to consider your own feelings and wants first – which raises your self-esteem and creates more self- respect. Remember, we allow people to treat us how they treat us, and men will start treating you the way you are treating yourself. Any time you hear the negative put-downs swirling around your head, think about what you’d say to your best friend or sister or daughter if she were telling you these things about herself. Then rewrite the script with love. Cultivating a positive relationship with yourself is the building block for attracting your Soulmate. You had given up on the idea that you’ll meet your Soulmate, but now you know that love is your birthright.
Allow that to sink in and look at your life for ways that you already feel love. Appreciate what is already there. You are embracing new empowering beliefs and attracting your Soulmate is one of them.
And now, here is HOW we are going to remind you of the goddess that you are – and that you don’t NEED a man to be enough, you need a man to compliment the life and being that you are.
We will start with the forgiveness and gratitude circle. A daily 5-10 minute exercise that will set the foundation for your day, and the rebuilding of your spirit.
What that means, is that you will take a few minutes to repeat the following sequence:
I forgive ______________ for_____________________
I forgive myself for____________________________
I am so grateful for____________________________
I love____________________________________________
Repeat that sequence every day until you run out of things to fill in those blanks!
In doing so, you are releasing pain, inviting pleasure, and sending a powerful message to the Universe that you are READY for love!
So take a few deep breaths, hug yourself for me, and let’s get you out of victim mode, and into victory mode…your Soulmate is waiting on you!
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